Thursday, February 25, 2010
Dreaming of the Big Win
Dreamt I'd made the final table of the World Series last night, can't quite remember everyone at the table - only that Daniel Negraneau was on my immediate right, and the recurring theme was that no one could understand my broad Derbyshire accent - the Dealer repeatedly kept saying to me 'English Only at the Table please' and I'd already had an F-Bomb penalty when he'd mis-understood my welcoming 'Ey Up Mi Duck' to Daniel as he sat down.
Daniel was his usual chatty self, trying to probe more for information - but he had trouble understanding me as I politely answered all his 'friendly questions'. The game progressed and the strange thing was that I got dealt Pocket Aces every hand but every time I bet everyone folded ....
Then I sat in the big blind for the key hand I looked down and, not Pocket Aces but Pocket Deuces ? .... Daniel in the small blind made up the blinds and there were just the two of us in the hand. As he bet he asked me what I did for a living ....
So, before making my bet, I politely replied 'ImALorryDriverMiDuck' ... Daniel look non-plussed ,
I spoke slower, and a little louder 'ImmmDeliverrrrrrinnnnnStuffInnnnnATruck' ..... still a vacant look
So I thought I'll speak even slower and shout even louder to make him understand, and perhaps try and describe it in a more American way ... so at the top of my voice I shouted
'I'M IN.... HAULIN' !!
At which point the dealer pipes up 'Player All-In', WTF !!
Daniel instantly calls and Turnover Pocket Aces !!!!
.... the Flop is dealt out ACE, KING,KING ... and which point I lose my composure and 'Ey up Mi Duck' becomes 'Ey yu Little Fuck', as the Dealer deals the turn and river, which are amazingly a TWO and another TWO. Quads for me !! - at which point I calm down and give Daniel my handkerchief, to mop his bloodied mouth, and courteously pick up two of his front teeth off the floor and place them into his top pocket.
.... Which is why playing Poker is clearly a game of Skill